TIMES OF CELEBRATION

We have had a few reasons to celebrate lately.  On Sunday I turned 43 years old.  I don't much get bothered by the age thing. When I turned thirty I was a little antsy about it, but 40 was not a big deal at all.  And now 43 is pretty damn cool.  I'm thinking it might be because I have a newfound career I love and I have five pain in the ass wonderful kids to keep me young.

For my birthday we went out to breakfast because we found we had a bit of money and some coupons but then we realized we were out of food money so I couldn't get a cake.  That's okay though because it helped me get down to 15 pounds total lost!!! (And don't worry, it's okay that our food budget was gone because we already had all of our breakfasts/lunches/dinners bought for the month.  We are far from starving!)

We were supposed to grill for my birthday dinner but The Hubs and Gwen spent all day outside with the neighbor trying to fix a car lock.  So we didn't have time to make the potatoes and the pork chops didn't get thawed so we had one of my least favorite dinners but that's okay because again it contributed to my fifteen pound weight loss!!!

One of my favorite blog pictures I live it, my characters live it.

Overall it was a decent birthday.  There were a few moments when I wanted to throttle a few people, but overall, we did good.

The second thing we celebrated was me finishing my latest novel!  Book three in my five book romance series is done!!!  All I have left is a bit of typing (since I handwrite my novels instead of typing them) and then it will be time for editing.  This story is very personal to me and very intense so I am feeling super drained now.  I have to pull things together and get it done so I can release it next month.  I can't, I can't I can't I can I can I can. I will!

Gwen and The Hubs and I will first tear it apart and then my other two beta readers will get ahold of it and then it will be sent to final editing.  I can't wait until it is done and published.  I think I will cherish it forever.  It is a complete labor of love that reduced me to tears more than once.  I can't wait for all of you to read it. I will have a release date soon.

The third thing we are celebrating is 15,000 page views here on the blog.  It has slowed way down, but I can't complain for the amount of effort I have put into it lately.  Between the kids, my hips and the novel, it is hard to put this first, but I will try to continue to entertain you.  (This is a bit late, we are actually at almost 16,000 now!)

Until Next Time...CELEBRATE EVERYTHING IN LIFE.  Period. End. Of. Story.

EXHAUSTING DAY OF FUN!

There are many aspects to who I am. Most of you know the broken mom and the housewife and the aspiring author so now I am enjoying letting you get to know the other part of me.  I am  a published author.

So, as a published author, I can't imagine having to go on a real book tour or having a bustling book release party. All of the traveling and sitting and signing would probably drive me nuts (although I hope to do it someday!)  But for now, since I'm not famous and nobody knows me enough to want to host a book signing, I will settle for virtual tours and book launches. As a matter of fact I had a 12 hour long (10 with breaks) Virtual Release Party yesterday.  Oh my goodness was it fun!  But dang, I never imagined how tiring it could be. Every hour on the hour (except for 4pm and 6pm) I had to be there to post something new.  Pictures, excerpts, buy links, sneak peeks etc.

I can say for sure that I slept very well last night!  I received a lot of feedback and I actually gave away a signed copy of one of my books and a free kindle copy of my latest book. People were actually interested in getting my stuff! (And no, all of them weren't friends and family, ha!) In all actuality I knew one of the winners because we met on a baby website/facebook because we have kiddo's the same age and the other person I don't know at all.  It is so exciting to know that my name is finally getting out there a bit! :)

I also like some of the reactions I had to my excerpts and plotlines for future books. My email and message box were blowing up!  Yesterday was one of the biggest highs I've ever had.  It was truthfully a glorious day. Now to see how it affects sales, if at all.  The next few days will be a test to see if I feel happy or disappointed. But even if I do feel disappointed, there will still be an element of happiness because I am writing, I am sharing what I love, and I am having one hell of a time doing it.

I am me - I am broken, I am blogger, I am author, I am happy!
Thanks everyone for your support.

Until Next Time...Sometimes the best days exhaust us, but you shouldn't let that take away from your joy.  Bask in the exhaustion, knowing that you have done something wonderful.

JJ Ellis: ALASKAN AMBUSH - EXCERPT CHAPTER 4

JJ Ellis: ALASKAN AMBUSH - EXCERPT CHAPTER 4:                     Olivia walked around his living room looking at some of his Alaskan trinkets. They were so rustic, so charming. There...

STRUGGLES WITH IMPERFECTION

So, over the last week I've been struggling with something that i just had to share as I think a lot of people struggle with it. IMPERFECTION.  I have learned to live with it in my house, with physical limitations and five kids there is no way I am ever going to keep my house perfect. I get it. I really do.  I've accepted it (for the most part). There will always be a dish not washed, clothes not washed/folded, toys not put away and dirt tracked through the house. (Unless of course I hire a maid to live in and follow the kids around with her cleaning supplies. Hmmm, wish I could afford that!)

My most recent struggle with imperfection came last week with my book Virgin Voyage. I finally got down to doing more than just skimming and reading my favorite parts. I was absolutely mortified to see that somehow my group of five people missed 15 mistakes in the Proof (me being one of them :/).  Things like know instead of known, child instead of children, improper indents that were made while formatting the book for publication, stray punctuation, improper punctuation.  Really really mortified!!!  (Not to mention the formatting issues of my Kindle copy that DID NOT show up on the preview I did before publication)

I had people tell me that I should just forget it and move on 15 mistakes in 312 pages wasn't bad. I had them tell me to just apologize and move on.  I tried, I really did. But I just couldn't ignore it or move on.  It haunted me, awake and asleep.  I had something that I loved so much, that was flawed, out and about and people were reading it.  After a few days, I just couldn't take it anymore I had to do something about it.  So I did.

I had been told that you couldn't re submit it once published but I did some research and found out that in fact you could. So this weekend I re uploaded my work for both the paperback and kindle versions. (I had a perfect copy already so I'm thinking that I uploaded the wrong copy or they used one of the previous copies I had uploaded when trying to make formatting perfect) I learned that if you upload a version and it needs corrections, to completely close out your browser and reopen it before uploading a new copy. So, anyway, I uploaded and republished my book without mistakes.  The preview of the Kindle showed it being perfect so if I notice on the actual Kindle that it isn't i'm going to be one upset mama. I ok'd the proof of the book this morning and am very happy with how it turned out.

I can not tell you how much better I feel now that I know that the product out there is as close to perfect as I could get it. A huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders.  Much of the depression I had been feeling is gone. (read my blog from Friday about my Depression). It is amazing how something can bother you so much, but when you really sit down and think about it, the solution is easy.  Do whatever you have in your power to fix it. My book was off the market for awhile and that could have hurt sales (haha not really with me, because no one has reviewed my book yet so I don't have an abundance of sales although my free weekend was amazing!) and it was a lot of work to make sure everything was perfect.  But the peace of mind I now have is indescribable. I wouldn't change it for the world.  I don't feel like a pretender anymore, I feel like a real author!!!

Until Next Time...If you want something to be perfect, then do whatever you have to do to make it that way, whether it be the first time or the tenth.  If you are not satisfied, try try try again until it is. Don't settle for second best just because it is easier!

SPRING FEVER AND ME!!!

Spring fever doesn't just hit school kids. Guess how I know that?  Yep, it has hit me so hard  I can't even function.  Of course it doesn't help me that my hips are driving me up a wall lately and I think I am coming down with something. Sore, dry throat, earache, stuffy hurting head.  Blah!

I am so excited about the next installment of my Sunset Destiny Romance series but I can't seem to bring myself to work on it much.  I assumed it was because of my hips and not being able to sit comfortably anywhere in the house to type. But then I started thinking about it.  I think I have spring fever.  Even as a school kid I never got it this early.  But then again as a school kid, our spring break was never the first week of March. :/

We had a few days of sixty degree weather and I must say it was heaven! Yeah yeah I know, sixty isn't too warm for most people, but for us here in Centeral Wyoming, that's bikini weather! It was perfect.  We'd had spring break and temps in the 50's and 60's spring must be here so the brain kicks in with spring fever.  And then what happens? I woke up to three inches of snow this morning and more is expected throughout the next few days.  Winter is back! So maybe my spring fever will go back into hibernation?   Yeah, probably not.  Once I get it I am stuck with it. (at least it's not a forever thing right?)

So what does that mean for my novel?  I'm not sure yet.  Maybe when this bug goes away and I'm not achy and stuffy and tired and blah I will feel comfortable enough to sit at the table and type again and I will only have to worry about keeping my mind on track and my novel will complete itself (seemingly not really). Or maybe once I feel better I will still be unable to get my butt up off the couch to head to the table and work. And maybe I will be able to write, but still not be able to figure out how to best structure my complicated  sentences. (Which makes for even more complicated editing).

For some reason I don't see this bout of Spring fever getting any better. And the main reason why is that we are all looking forward to The Senior's graduation. [SCHOOL IS ALMOST OVER!!!] How in the heck can I concentrate when my daughter is going through one of the most stressful, exciting, wonderful times of her life!  And then I have to prepare for the relatives that will invade in May.  That will be much more exciting than concentrating on sentence structure and Grammar. (Although it won't be as exciting as concentrating on my story line. so hmmmm....)

As it is, I have started to let the kids slack on chores and they got so used to it that I had to get tough again. Hopefully my house will shape up but I somehow doubt it will, at least before guests start to arrive.  But that's okay, it's spring right?

I've met people who don't suffer from spring fever and I envy them.  I always have, I probably always will.  I crave watching my kids go outside to play or being able to sleep in, or do whatever they want during the day.  The teachers that pile on the homework start to piss me off this time of year and I know it's wrong to be mad, but come on people it's spring, the weather is changing (in most places at least) It's time to relax and have some fun! Okay, so I know the work still needs to be done, but I DON'T WANNA!!!! I have spring fever after all ;) And all I want to do is play with my new Kindle Fire (a very generous gift) and relax to recover from scraping windows all winter!

Until Next Time...If you get spring fever, enjoy it! But don't let it take over your life because eventually you will HAVE TO get back to work!!!!

COURAGE

Yesterday was a huge day for my family. Something we had all been working toward finally came to fruition. I became a published author. Everybody is so happy for me and I am grateful for the support.

So the day was all a giant celebration right? Nope. It was at first.  The family went out for lunch and they gave me peace and quiet while I finished up the marketing and kindle publishing. But then as usual  mama started to get a bit overwhelmed. Still excited - absolutely. Still grateful - absolutely. Absolutely one hundred percent overwhelmed - Oh hell yeah!

The Shooter and I decided to go out for dinner alone to celebrate and I perked up a bit, but as soon as we got home I started to slide again.  What the hell had I gotten myself into! People on my Facebook groups were talking about reading what I'd written. Crap what had just happened? Just a couple years ago it was almost impossible for me to let anyone read what I wrote. I had to literally force myself to let my own husband read it, and here I was putting it out there for everyone to read.

I started to second guess myself. What if it sucked.  What if the feedback I got from friends, family and strangers was all a lie.  What if I disappointed my friends when they read the book.  What if, what if, what if.  I had a lot of that going on last night! By the time I went to bed, I was about ready to crawl into a hole and hide forever so I wouldn't have to see the faces/hear the voices/see the posts of people who were reading my book.  I convinced myself that I didn't have any talent whatsoever and that I had just embarrassed myself on a global scale.

I read for a bit before bed - another self published author who I wont' mention by name, and checked Facebook on my phone one last time.  There I found out from a friend that my kindle version was finally available so of course I had to drag my big butt out of bed to get online to check. And there it was, in all it's glory, with a preview of the prologue, chapter 1 and part of 2. I read it and truthfully it was good. Much better than the book I'd just been reading (and it wasn't that bad really). I know I am nowhere near a great writer, I will probably never be the next Steven King, or Nora Roberts, , Edgar Alan Poe, or Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens). But you know, I could be worse and I think I wove a great story. And I know I will get better with time and with each book I write and each bit of studying I do.

So, what did it take for me to be a published author?  Courage. Plain and simple it took courage.  But how did I get that courage?  I am the biggest chicken s**t in the world when it comes to putting myself out there.  I hate criticism and I hate negativity. Well, truthfully I will never know what gave me the courage.  I had a lot of support and great people to work with, but I don't think that would have been enough to get me over my horrible fears.  All I know is that I am grateful for the courage I was able to come up with because this is absolutely the best feeling in the world right now.  I can't count on both hands how many books I've sold so far and the rush is incredible.  I know I will have more moments of self doubt (probably many more) but I am prepared to combat them.......with COURAGE.

Until next time...If you finally find the courage to do something you've always wanted to do but were too afraid to pursue it, then go with the flow!!!! Don't question it, just do it! Courage can pop up in times when you least expect it and for that I will be forever grateful.

MY BOOK COVER

Here you go folks! I promised a sneak peek of the book cover, so here it is.  Keep your eyes and ears open this coming week for release info.  When it happens it will be immediate!